hey yall. I worte a story for school and its a bit long but here it is.
It all started that dreary day in October. My mom and dad announced that we were moving, but i had no idea where. And now I am here at the bottom of an elevator shaft reading the next clue in a scavenger hunt that is never ending. A lot has happened in the past days. The most important being th me, my mom and dad moved into an old, creepy sandstone building in the middle of nowhere, and turned it into a hotel/gift shop. And if thats not weird enough I found a time capsule dated 1850 containing a clue which led to another clue which led me here. How I got here isn't important but what is important is that I have the next clue. Here is what it says: You feel a breeze, Between you knees, Be careful not to fall, That wouldn't be good at all, Just go over and look, Under an old hook. What the heck does that mean? Oh well I better get out of here. I look up into the darkness and to my surprise a face looks back. "Hey!" I hollar. "Wanna help me?" The face dissapears and soon enough a rope crashes to the floor. Once at the top I found myself looking at a young boy with crazy blonde hair, glasses and suspenders. "Thanks," I say. "No problem," He replies. "What were you doing down there?" "Its a long story," "I've got time, my mom is just looking in your gift shop." "Allright, whats your name anyhow?" "Spancer J. Picker, yours?" "Cynthia Rodgers." "Well Cynithia get on with it." "Well it all started one day when I was on the third floor of this building. I was looking around at all the old photos and mirrors, when I saw a white tube dated 1850, I opened it and found a clue that led me to a loose floorboard in the kitchen, which had another clue which led me to the bottom of the elevator shaft." "Well, did you find another clue?" He asked. "Yep, here it is," I said handing him the old paper. He looked at it for awhile then said: "Well, where does this one lead you?" "That is what I need to find out." "Okay, well you are probably outside considering that you can feel the wind. You've got to be up high because you need to be able to fall, and there has got to be a hook somewhere," he said. "Hmmmm," I thought "Maybe its out back on a hill, no because there are no hooks. Maybe its......" my thoughts trailed off and were intereupted by Spencer. "I know, I bet you its on the roof," Spencer exasperated. "Hey, I bet your right, come on lets go see." Spencer and I ran up four flights if stairs and finally reached the small crawl hole that led to the roof. I pushed Spencer through and then crawled through myself. Just as the clue said wind was blowing everywhere causing me to loose my balance. I looked down and saw spancer carwling close to the ground. "COME ON!" he screams over the wind "I SEE A BIG HOOK OVER THERE." I crawl over to Spencer and we lift up the hook, we find a clue under it. "I think we better read it inside," I say. We both crawl over to the hole and land hard on the floor. "What does it say? What does it say?" Spencer says jumping up and down with excitement. I unfold the paper and this is what it says: You are near the end, and will find something new, Just look down underground in number 32. "Well clearly we need to go down to the basement," Spencers says "but in number 32, thats what I don't get." "No, no, no, we cannot go into the basement, my parents won't let me, they say its dark and creepy and infested with rats and spiders." "Well we have to, come on Cynthia it says we near the end, we have got to get to the bottom of this." "Well, okay but we have to sneek down there." Spencer and I walk down the the main floor and nonchalontly grab two flashlights and head for the basement. We walk down the stairs and push open the big white door. "Creaaaaaaak," the door sounds. We stop. My heart feels like it is going to explode.Spencer wipes some sweat from his face and we continue. Once we have the door open we catiously enter taking care not to walk to loudly. We shine our flashlights around and see many doors with numbers on them. I don't dare talk to Spencer and his face looks shocked. We look at each door trying to find a number 32. Spencer flashes his light down a dark spider webbed hall. At the end of the hall is a big brass door labled 32. Spencer motions me over. "Glup." I look back to our only way of survival, the door leading to the basement. "Should I run?" I ask myself. I couldn't, something inside me ,curiosity i guess prevented me from running. I look at Spencer and we start down the hall. Every footstep seems louder and louder. We reach the door after a long and painful trek down the hall. We both brab the dornob, turn and push our way into a small room covered in cobwebbs. To our dismay we find nothing, no note, nothing. I motion to Spencer that we should leave, but he refuses. Shinning his flashlight around, Spencer looks puzzled. Then, I noticed something on the ground a handle. I drop to the ground and start pulling it, Spencer joins me. Not before long we have the trapdoor open and are looking down into a big room filled to the brim with gold. I look at Spencer and see his shinning eyes filled with glee. I brake the silence. "We did it Spencer!" I yell. Neither of us are scared anymore. We cant contain ourselves. We jump in the air, twirl around, scream and shout.
"Hello, and welcome the News talk 16/20, I am Brian Jones." "And I am Lucy." "And we are here to tell you about a breaking story. In the small town of Hot Springs, South Dakota, in the Minnekahta, a historic sandstone building, two young kids have found a fortune of money leading all the way back to 1849, the California Gold Rush. Fred Simmons the original builder of the Minnekahta was close friends with James Wilson Marshall, the first man to discover gold. Burrying his treasure in the Minnekahta, he left clues that led to this treasure. Cynthis Rodgers and Spencer Picker followed these clues and reaped the benefits. Today Cynthia and Spencer and traveling the world looking for more clues to be unraveled. Thanks for listeneing. I'm Brian Jones." "And I am Lucy." "Gooday and Goodnight."
cool dude, i think its real swell. is that the whole thing? There are a few typos i saw and some parts where the tense changes but otherwise i think its good.
2 Comments:
hey yall. I worte a story for school and its a bit long but here it is.
It all started that dreary day in October. My mom and dad announced that we were moving, but i had no idea where. And now I am here at the bottom of an elevator shaft reading the next clue in a scavenger hunt that is never ending. A lot has happened in the past days. The most important being th me, my mom and dad moved into an old, creepy sandstone building in the middle of nowhere, and turned it into a hotel/gift shop. And if thats not weird enough I found a time capsule dated 1850 containing a clue which led to another clue which led me here. How I got here isn't important but what is important is that I have the next clue. Here is what it says:
You feel a breeze,
Between you knees,
Be careful not to fall,
That wouldn't be good at all,
Just go over and look,
Under an old hook.
What the heck does that mean? Oh well I better get out of here. I look up into the darkness and to my surprise a face looks back.
"Hey!" I hollar. "Wanna help me?" The face dissapears and soon enough a rope crashes to the floor. Once at the top I found myself looking at a young boy with crazy blonde hair, glasses and suspenders.
"Thanks," I say.
"No problem," He replies. "What were you doing down there?"
"Its a long story,"
"I've got time, my mom is just looking in your gift shop."
"Allright, whats your name anyhow?"
"Spancer J. Picker, yours?"
"Cynthia Rodgers."
"Well Cynithia get on with it."
"Well it all started one day when I was on the third floor of this building. I was looking around at all the old photos and mirrors, when I saw a white tube dated 1850, I opened it and found a clue that led me to a loose floorboard in the kitchen, which had another clue which led me to the bottom of the elevator shaft."
"Well, did you find another clue?" He asked.
"Yep, here it is," I said handing him the old paper. He looked at it for awhile then said:
"Well, where does this one lead you?"
"That is what I need to find out."
"Okay, well you are probably outside considering that you can feel the wind. You've got to be up high because you need to be able to fall, and there has got to be a hook somewhere," he said.
"Hmmmm," I thought "Maybe its out back on a hill, no because there are no hooks. Maybe its......" my thoughts trailed off and were intereupted by Spencer.
"I know, I bet you its on the roof," Spencer exasperated.
"Hey, I bet your right, come on lets go see." Spencer and I ran up four flights if stairs and finally reached the small crawl hole that led to the roof. I pushed Spencer through and then crawled through myself. Just as the clue said wind was blowing everywhere causing me to loose my balance. I looked down and saw spancer carwling close to the ground.
"COME ON!" he screams over the wind "I SEE A BIG HOOK OVER THERE." I crawl over to Spencer and we lift up the hook, we find a clue under it.
"I think we better read it inside," I say. We both crawl over to the hole and land hard on the floor.
"What does it say? What does it say?" Spencer says jumping up and down with excitement. I unfold the paper and this is what it says:
You are near the end, and will find something new,
Just look down underground in number 32.
"Well clearly we need to go down to the basement," Spencers says "but in number 32, thats what I don't get."
"No, no, no, we cannot go into the basement, my parents won't let me, they say its dark and creepy and infested with rats and spiders."
"Well we have to, come on Cynthia it says we near the end, we have got to get to the bottom of this."
"Well, okay but we have to sneek down there." Spencer and I walk down the the main floor and nonchalontly grab two flashlights and head for the basement. We walk down the stairs and push open the big white door.
"Creaaaaaaak," the door sounds. We stop. My heart feels like it is going to explode.Spencer wipes some sweat from his face and we continue. Once we have the door open we catiously enter taking care not to walk to loudly. We shine our flashlights around and see many doors with numbers on them. I don't dare talk to Spencer and his face looks shocked. We look at each door trying to find a number 32. Spencer flashes his light down a dark spider webbed hall. At the end of the hall is a big brass door labled 32. Spencer motions me over. "Glup." I look back to our only way of survival, the door leading to the basement. "Should I run?" I ask myself. I couldn't, something inside me ,curiosity i guess prevented me from running. I look at Spencer and we start down the hall. Every footstep seems louder and louder. We reach the door after a long and painful trek down the hall. We both brab the dornob, turn and push our way into a small room covered in cobwebbs. To our dismay we find nothing, no note, nothing. I motion to Spencer that we should leave, but he refuses. Shinning his flashlight around, Spencer looks puzzled. Then, I noticed something on the ground a handle. I drop to the ground and start pulling it, Spencer joins me. Not before long we have the trapdoor open and are looking down into a big room filled to the brim with gold. I look at Spencer and see his shinning eyes filled with glee. I brake the silence.
"We did it Spencer!" I yell. Neither of us are scared anymore. We cant contain ourselves. We jump in the air, twirl around, scream and shout.
"Hello, and welcome the News talk 16/20, I am Brian Jones."
"And I am Lucy."
"And we are here to tell you about a breaking story. In the small town of Hot Springs, South Dakota, in the Minnekahta, a historic sandstone building, two young kids have found a fortune of money leading all the way back to 1849, the California Gold Rush. Fred Simmons the original builder of the Minnekahta was close friends with James Wilson Marshall, the first man to discover gold. Burrying his treasure in the Minnekahta, he left clues that led to this treasure. Cynthis Rodgers and Spencer Picker followed these clues and reaped the benefits. Today Cynthia and Spencer and traveling the world looking for more clues to be unraveled. Thanks for listeneing. I'm Brian Jones."
"And I am Lucy."
"Gooday and Goodnight."
cool dude, i think its real swell. is that the whole thing? There are a few typos i saw and some parts where the tense changes but otherwise i think its good.
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